It is still a fresh memory today.
As if the whole thing had recently happened.
Embarrassing, but so much fun,
Some friends (who are also family) were visiting from home, so we decided that it would be fun to try out punting.
A punt, in case you were unaware, is a long narrow flat boat used for maneuvering shallow water.
When you rent a punt, you are provided with a long pole.
The pole is used to push the punt into motion.
Sounds simple enough, right?
So we went for it.
These long boats look so graceful as they glide through the waters around the old college buildings that, along with weeping willows, line the river Cam.
It is a dreamy and peacefully idyllic English scene.
Think "Water Music Suite" peaceful.
Until "we" got in the water!
At this point I have to tell you that pushing with the pole does not work as well when you want to turn the boat quickly!
We found this out the hard way.
There was a family of ducks.
You probably know the rest.
We struggled to avoid crashing the boat into the ducks, and ended up dividing the little family.
After we had passed, they were quick to get reunited, and did not seem nearly as stressed as we were.
Thankfully no ducks were harmed!!
Nevertheless, try as hard as we could, we could not make our punt go where we wanted!
All of our effort was wasted, and on top of that, we probably looked rather pathetic.
Finally, a kind gentleman circled his little boat around us over and over again,
while explaining that we were steering the punt all wrong.
It was the way we were using the pole.
"Use it as a rudder!!" he shouted.
It took several times before we were able to understand what he was saying,
but once his advice was clear?
"Ah... we can do that."
So we did.
And it worked.
Just holding the pole down on one side or the other turned the boat easily left or right,
and we were off.
Well ...
there was that one point where we had to push with the pole to get out of being stuck under one of those beautiful ancient weeping willows.
In the end, it was an enjoyable day and is a great memory.
I was reminded of it recently while I was reading James.
James had some things to say about rudders.
And great ships.
About how those great ships were controlled, even in a storm, by a small rudder.
Not the other way around.
The rudder steered the ship, the ship did not control the rudder!
And that is the picture he wants us to have as he brings up the subject of the tongue.
James says,
"Consider ships -
though very large and driven by fierce winds, they are guided by a very small rudder
wherever the will of the pilot directs.
So too though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts great things!"
(James 3:5)
We know, it should be different.
But those words of ours?
Just sitting there on the edge of that tongue and before we know what is happening?
Oh my word...
Seriously, there are so many ways I blow it with words.
Sometimes unintentional, but much too often, I know what I am doing, and do it anyway.
Even as I tell myself I'm messing up.
You may have never used your tongue in a way that hurt someone,
but I think we have all felt the pain of being on the receiving end.
The one who wounded will most certainly regret it at some point.
By then it is too late.
The words are out there and cannot be retrieved.
Today you don't even have to use your tongue.
Our keyboards can manage to be destructive quite well.
Words...
They can be used to hurt, but also heal.
To harm but also help.
To bring humiliation or bring honor.
Our words can be hollow, or harmonious.
They can offer hope like a great big hug to your heart.
They can leave us with a heaviness that never leaves.
Words can bring up mental images like losing control on a busy highway
or settled in to a peaceful harbor
. They can be words that offer hospitality or words that hinder community.
Our words matter and in all of the cacophony I want mine to be different.
In the third chapter of his book, James says,
... "brothers and sisters, these things should not be this way"!
I think we really already know that.
But I'm sorry.
I don't have any easy 3-step solution that can guarantee 100% success.
I am still struggling in this myself.
One thing I do know.
The words that I speak are heard.
And they are heard by real life people - not just somebody "out there",
but somebody "out there" who is also immortal.
Somebody who will be affected by my words.
My words.
To and about His creation.
The person who receives my words matters much.
But to Jesus, they matter most.
He says in Matthew 12:34 that the mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart.
So it is a heart issue ... more than a tongue issue.
This made me think...
I have another memory that may shed some light on this.
When we came home from living overseas, people noticed quickly that our children talked differently. They had English accents, and they used English words.
Being in the environment and culture of England affected even those little details for them.
Maybe if we saturate our heart in the language that we want to use?
Fill our minds with words that emphasize Kindness? Gentleness? Patience?
Allow the Spirit to guide our tongue instead of the tongue guiding us?
Because when the words that I am speaking horizontally matter as much as they do,
I need to make it a priority to spend some honest time in vertical communication with the Lord.
...to be sure my heart is where it needs to be so that my words are the words that they need to be.
Gracious Discourse... reminding myself.
